Category Archives: anger

Holding Grudges

Time passes unhindered. When we make mistakes, we cannot turn the clock back and try again. All we can do is use the present well.”  Dalai Lama

“An open heart is an open mind.” Dalai Lama.

“We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves”  Dalai Lama

“The goal is not to be better than the other man, but your previous self.” Dalai Lama

“One problem with our current society is that we have an attitude towards education as if it is there to simply make you more clever, make you more ingenious… Even though our society does not emphasize this, the most important use of knowledge and education is to help us understand the importance of engaging in more wholesome actions and bringing about discipline within our minds. The proper utilization of our intelligence and knowledge is to effect changes from within to develop a good heart.”  Dalai Lama

Grudges is a nasty  word to begin a post but if we are hoping to let the grudge go then it is a post full of hope. I like everyone else have carried my grudges like trophies in my pocket. In a way I am proud of them because it denotes suffering and endured pain. It proves I have endurance and stamina to  have put up with such situations. I have instilled in myself all the reasons I was right and I absolve myself from any guilty feelings. If I must give myself any blame I go with 10 percent. Somehow that appears to be an acceptable amount. Continue reading

Power Struggles

Animals11“Don’t be satisfied with stories, how things have gone with others. Unfold your own myth.” Rumi
“The true measure of success is how many times you can bounce back from failure.” Stephen Richards

“The battle you are going through is not fueled by the words or actions of others; it is fueled by the mind that gives it importance.” Shannon L. Alder

Power struggles are painful and stressful. I wonder how we get ourselves into a power struggle and why. I hate to say this but again I sometimes think our egos get us in the middle. We don’t have to have big egos either in order to have it throw up its’ head in arrogance. Perhaps our egos just hate to always lose and on any given day we are apt to appear more prideful than we actually  are or believe. Continue reading

The Fear Of Failure

“All the elements for your happiness are already here. There’s no need to run, strive. At any moment, you have a choice, that either leads you closer to your spirit or further away from it.”    Thich Nhat Hahn

“By listening with calm and understanding, we can ease the suffering of another person. Obstacles can be a form of liberation. Difficulties are required for success.” Thich Nhat Hahn

All of us have so many fears but perhaps the biggest one is the fear of failure. It kind of groups all the other fears together. Whether it is our spouse, parent, child boss friend or enemy we hate to drop the ball and be considered a loser. The trouble is we can’t really define just what a loser is or what it means. We have bad vibes about failing and never consider that there might be a bright side to failing. Continue reading

Bullying Is Real; Defeat It

“When I wrote on my door: leave your hypocrisy outside before you come in. Not a soul dared to visit me or open my door.” Khalil Gibran

“A wise woman wishes to be no one’s enemy; a wise woman refuses to be anyone’s victim.”     Maya Angelou

“I swore never to be silent whenever and wherever human beings endure suffering and humiliation. We must always take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented.”    Elie Wiesel

Bullying has been around for a long time, and has increased its area of ruin. Recently it has been placed in the spotlight. We become aware of it when a person hurts another. We miss it in ourselves. It possibly is promoted through our daily interactions. Bullying has surfaced into the daylight. It is ugly if we are honest about it. We should not be surprised at how rampant it has become. Many of us have been guilty of bullying or we have been the victims of bullies.. Maybe it’s time to reflect on those times we have been at fault, for bullying another.

We need to have the confidence in ourselves so that we don’t feel the need to knock another down, in order for us to feel better, or get ahead. Carefully watching our actions and their consequences is vital. Society suffers with every bully action displayed towards another person. Recognizing ourselves in these situations helps us to overcome it. Strive for tolerance of others, by  disregardless their differences. We are obliged to support our children in their endeavor to become more empathetic, and accepting of others. Many of us are able to accept those who are different. It’s time to accept those who are similar to us, and pose a jealousy threat. Continue reading

Alter Your Frame Of Mind With Ease

“Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.”

“Peace comes from within. do not seek  it without.”

“To understand everything is to forgive everything.”

“Those who are free of resentful thoughts surely find peace.”

There are days when everything goes smoothly and you get the feeling you have your life totally under control. You have a sense of who you are, where you are going and what you are doing. People behave the way you expect and you understand them completely. They speak and understand what you are talking about and their support is endless. You get an overwhelming feeling of support and the notion that you are not alone.

Then come those days of utter defeat. Nothing goes according to plan and many plans are changed and demolished at a moments notice. The responses you receive from others are shattering and your nerves take the hit from all over your body. You almost question if your previous assumptions about anybody and anything were even close to being accurate. Continue reading

Accept Love Reject Revenge

“Man must evolve for all human conflict a method which rejects revenge, aggression and retaliation. The foundation of such a method is love.”  Martin Luther King, Jr.

“Man has lost the capacity to foresee and to forestall. He will end by destroying the earth.”  Albert Schweitzer

“Positive  thoughts open a door in our minds inviting like thoughts in. Other thoughts may attack and that is where forgiveness may help us.”   Charles Henry

So many thoughts and feelings parade through our minds and confuse our decisions, dreams and goals. Sometimes it turns our actions into inactions and we become almost immobilized. Someone’s quick remarks make us angry or hurt because it is infused with jealousy or ungratefulness. Our first idea is to lash out with insults or angry words. Of course our minds are so caught up in confusion with trying to straighten out all that we are thinking about that we miss the opportunity to say anything. upon reflection that is probably the only good thing about our situation.

I know I am as guilty as anyone regarding gratefulness. there are numerous times when I either don’t feel it when I should or I do feel it but don’t mention it to the people who need to hear it. It still practically causes  me pain when I listen to someone mention all the wonderful happenings in their lives yet have the agenda to teach a lesson or I call it hurt another individual who in the past has hurt them. To me it is like kicking someone when they are down on the ground. It is cold planned and calculated. That appears to be worse than retaliating at the moment of an injury or shortly after. Continue reading

Calmness Soothes Anger

“Your daily life is your temple and your religion. When you enter into it take with you your all.”    Khalil Gibran

It was a sad day as I watched a mother lose her patience with her tow year old on a bus. She smacked the baby on the bum and he in turn cried until they reached their bus stop. The dad took the child and tried to talk with him but the toddler immediately smacked the dad a few times while crying. I wondered if those smacks registered with either parent. The child was imitating his parents  and doing a very good job.

Another couple I was with mentioned how they had recently observed a mother smacking her older child in front of everyone. As we were discussing these issues a dad was screaming a the top of his lungs in the face of his small child around three and in a carriage. The child was screaming himself but the dad’s face was in the child’s face and although he never hit the child in front of any of us, his intimidating loud voice was more than enough. Continue reading