Tag Archives: envy

Bitterness Eases When We Stop Pointing The Finger

“Shallow men believe in luck Strong men believe in cause and effect.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Happiness is not a when or a where; it can be a here and now. But until you are happy with who you are you will never be happy because of what you have.” Zig Ziglar

A surprising number pf people live with bitterness. We were wronged and in order to get past it we must voice it to a lot of people. We need justice and an apology which gets bigger with time. It is difficult at first to accept the loss of a family member or close friend but as soon as they apologize we will resume the friendship. Our friend or family member is feeling the same way and they are not swerving from their position.

We avoid each other and attempt to discuss the situation. As time passes we begin to live with our own rules. We must save our pride so we let the relationship disintegrate. Now we miss this person but can’t admit it in any way. Our bitterness keeps us locked up and more resolved to keep our stand. We think of the other person as ridiculous to keep a stupid thing going but we refuse to budge and make the first move. Continue reading

Take The Positive Approach

“No pessimist ever discovered the secrets of the stars, or sailed to an enchanted land, or opened a new doorway for the human spirit.” Helen Keller

Was the meeting expressive or repressive? We survived it. It would be nice if we could say we enjoyed it and I am now convinced I can say it I do enjoy the gatherings. I focus on my attitude and not the attitude of others. If someone tries to draw me into a controversial discussion I do not take the bait. Sometimes people are just in a bad mood so I keep my distance until it is safe. Did you ever notice as I have that when I am in a bad mood I tend to take it out on the same person. It seems to happen that some person is most likely the recipient of our anger if they are nearby. Of course if they are not it leaves us with finding another.

It proves to me that lots of times my anger might be unjustified and the result of my own mood. I am beginning to feel guilty already. if I upset others  it results in a domino effect. It makes me think beyond my decision and concludes with a more positive result. To think how many times I have caused my own terrible  experiences makes me want to reprimand myself. Continue reading

Break The Chains Of Worry

“Life is made of memorable moments. We must teach ourselves to really live…to love the journey not the destination.” Ann Quindlen

“There is  something more-the spirit, or the soul. I think that that quality encourages our courtesy and care and our minds. And mercy and identity.”    Maya Angelou

I think there could be endless discussions about fear because it consumes a huge part of our lives. We all fear so many things that they are too numerous to count. We fear our meetings with the relatives. We want the right look, the right words, and to project the right meaning. We worry if our gift is appropriate. We worry about the meaning of the gifts we receive. We fear an others remarks or jokes or slights. We tense at an others body language and question someone’s  mood.

Can anyone see a problem here? We are not in the moment. We are obviously not enjoying ourselves. We are almost being selfish in a sense because we are so caught up in the relationship another person has with us that we actually miss the reality around us. To question everyone and everything is a distrust. Continue reading

Baby Steps Inspire Forward Movement

“Challenges make you discover things about yourself that you never really knew. They’re what make the instrument stretch-what makes you go beyond the norm.”    Cicely Tyson

There are so many times when i wanted to speak up and say something or defend someone or state a fact. I waited too long because I  was nervous and I missed the opportunity. When I listen to a discussion and believe what is being said is an untruth, I can feel my body tense and my heart begins to race. i want to speak but I keep waiting for the right moment to jump in. The time never happens. I am left depleted and discouraged. I believe I have no confidence and I am disgusted with myself and the person who spoke falsehoods without being challenged. Continue reading

Leave Your Ego At Home Then Enjoy The Party

 At Holiday get-together s we sometimes spend more time worrying about the family we will be interacting with, than the simple pleasure of their company. We are wasting a happy occasion with our non-stop anxieties. Many of these fears are of our own making and actually carry no weight. Other family members who are also attending are probably bringing their own set of worries. All of us are oblivious to each other because we are focusing on our own thoughts about the Holiday. Likely we all feel insecure about ourselves and it registers with fear, anxiety, distrust, and worry. We are not paying the slightest attention to others. We are solely focused on ourselves and our concern of the judgments of others. If we could simply view the Holiday gathering with different eyes we might be able to enjoy the upcoming event. My best to you with this endeavor. I offer a few of my insights on family bonding. Continue reading

Stop Envy and Heal Pain – Caring For Yourself And Others

“Shallow men believe in luck Strong men believe in cause and effect.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

We all experience envy throughout our lifetimes. But even though it may always be present, we can keep envious feelings restrained. All of us struggle to balance our lives. We presume on the surface others have life easier. But all of us struggle. Some hide the labor of their lives better than others and some complain less. The grind is enduring for all. Supporting each other as well as managing the envious tendencies can make life so much easier. Praise and gratitude promote healing for our pain, frustration and envy. Complimenting another actually releases our envy. It can evaporate our insecurities and allow us to see the good qualities in another without making ourselves feel diminished. Our talents are real. We need to recognize them. We don’t need to be someone else to gain satisfaction in our lives. Continue reading