When we refuse to judge others, we express love and compassion. Love does not mean we become passive and allow others to abuse us. It is quite the contrary.
Compassion is not weak but strong. It allows us to see where the suffering in the world arises. People can irritate us every day with their silly antics. We may think a compassionate heart means we are to ignore the irritations and allow others to walk all over us.
Some people do and say mean things, while others are coerced into remaining tolerant. One’s tolerance level can be commendable, but there lies the secret. Enduring a constant onslaught of trivial complaints leads one to resent the issues people complain about. This may happen when we judge in secrecy.
Convert Confrontations to Compromise
The revelation of private judgements took me by surprise one day. Outwardly, we keep most of our opinions to ourselves. We may join a discussion but attempt to remain neutral for the sake of keeping peace and refrain from hurting someone’s feelings.
There are times when our disagreements turn into a confrontation due to strong viewpoints. This allows one to stand firm in their convictions. However, it makes it difficult to bend. Blessed are those who can bend. Continue reading →
“You give but little when you give of your own possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.” Kahil Gibran
We search for things all the time. We can never seem to get everything done by the end of the day. We think, maybe if I try harder tomorrow or give up some lunch time or get out earlier from work or get up earlier etc. We’re all lacking time yet we are not so worried about time. It’s as if we want all their is in the amount of time we get in a day. Continue reading →
If one searches for the word nurturing in a dictionary it means things like cherish, support, care for, look after, and take care of.
Bringing up children goes beyond our wildest thoughts about what parenthood means. If the funds are low it is essential to find ways to make save and use our income frugally. Competing for our children’s love by purchasing toys is never a good solution for any parent. Toys should never be used manipulatively as a way to apologize for our anger or obtain our children’s love or attention. Our children’s love cannot be bought. Continue reading →
“The degree of one’s emotion varies inversely with one’s knowledge of the facts. The less you know the hotter you get.” Anonymous
The third pitfall to avoid is misconstruing what others say. If one doesn’t then it may place us as close to a disaster in a relationship as anyone could get. Many times we misinterpret what others say and flavor the words with our own ideas. This obviously haunts us and leads our minds down roads that we were never meant to travel. Our feelings take over because we assume it is all about us. Words can hurt us. If we question what is said it allows for discourse and understanding although an others motives for the dialogue may still appear as secretive. Continue reading →
“Reputation is what others think about you; character is what God knows about you. Adrian Rogers
Independence can mean different things to a variety of people. This liberty is vital and necessary. Regarding the mother-in-law (MIL) and daughter-in-law (DIL) it allows one to accept help when one needs it and to refuse it when a person doesn’t want aid. We all have capacities and talents. If we trust ourselves and have confidence, we recognize at times, the need to acquiesce to another so as not to decimate their independence.
Even if certain ideas are more appealing or are proven to be better, silence may be our best ally. We can’t push our ways onto another. We can be right and we can be wrong because we are independent of another. Security and confidence produces a kindness sprinkled with patience. We have nothing to prove. When we have the need to make a point or win an argument we are less confident full of anxiety due to our inner feelings of inadequacies. It doesn’t mean we are lacking at all. It does exhibit a need for inner contemplation and a sense of questioning why we feel inferior. Continue reading →