Tag Archives: time

Rejection Is Complicated

“Most fears of rejection rest on the desire for approval from other people. Don’t base your self-esteem on their opinions.”    Harvey Mackay

“The ultimate authority must always rest with the individual’s own reason and critical analysis.” Dalai Lama

“All religions try to benefit people, with the same basic message of the need for love and compassion, for justice and honesty, for contentment.”    Dalai Lama

“Logically, harmony must come from the heart… Harmony very much based on trust. As soon as use force, creates fear. Fear and trust cannot go together.”    Dalai Lama

When we think about rejection, we recall friendships and boyfriends and girlfriends. Upon our loss of any kind, we review what we did and said and how others interacted with us. Many times we are left with feelings of guilt, remorse and we become determined to refrain from repeating what we perceive as the mistakes. How guilty we make ourselves believe. Even when others hurt us we somehow manage to turn it around and blame ourselves for the agonizing results. Continue reading

Commitment Anxiety

“Too many Christians have a commitment of convenience. They’ll stay faithful as long as it’s safe and doesn’t involve risk, rejection, or criticism. Instead of standing alone in the face of challenge or temptation, they check to see which way their friends are going.”    Charles Stanley

“When you encourage others, you in the process are encouraged because you’re making a commitment and difference in that person’s life. Encouragement really does make a difference.”    Zig Ziglar

“Love, above all things, is a commitment to your choice.” ―Rob Liano

“The truest form of love is how you behave toward someone, not how you feel about them.”― Steve Hal

Commitment always brings on the fear. Just the word will make most of us cringe. I think women as well as men, are nervous when they hear the word spoken. As much as I am a spontaneous person, and always willing to go along with someone’s agenda, I hate to be tied down to commitments of any kind. I even  end my doctors visits, upon receiving the card for my next appointment, with the words, “I’ll call and change it if I can’t make it.” I can’t remember many times I had to change it, but the  relief I feel, knowing I can switch it, is a stress reliever.

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Turning Disappointment Into Acceptance

“Family dinners are more often than not an ordeal of nervous indigestion, preceded by hidden resentment and ennui and accompanied by psychosomatic jitters.”    M. K. Fisher

“The man who is anybody and who does anything is surely going to be criticized, vilified, and misunderstood. This is a part of the penalty for greatness, and every great man understands it; and understands, too, that it is no proof of greatness. The final proof of greatness lies in being able to endure contumely without resentment.”    Elbert Hubbard

I find the thing that brings the most heartache and pain is disappointment. Every day there is so much need to face discouraging situations. At home it is frustrating if we feel the workload is not fairly divided. At this time loading the dishwasher which wasn’t suppose to be  our job, gets irritating with every dish. Perhaps the job isn’t as hard as our anger at having to do it. Continue reading

Yanked In Many Directions

“The tension between ‘yes’ and ‘no’, between ‘I can’ and ‘I cannot’, makes us feel that, in so many instances, human life is an interminable debate with one’s self.”    Anatole Broyard

“Let your heart rule your emotions but let your mind rule your actions.” Idleheart

I don’t know about others but there are so many days when everywhere I look there are jobs to be done and turmoil surrounding them. I suppose like rain we must put up with those sorts of days to appreciate some days we have breakthroughs. It is so hard to focus  on those types of days. To add some fuel to the fire you get that person who annoyingly points out something you forgot or messed up on. I wonder how those people continue to exist.

Seriously though a bad day is a bad day regardless of the weather. I want to figure out why we have so many more bad days than good. I search for my own understanding of a horrible day and assume it has to do with a few things. First of all it is  other people who can alter your mood and turn things sour. They just have a knack for saying or doing annoying things that make one reach the boiling point and then release their built up frustration either in unkindly remarks or by taking it out on themselves internally. Continue reading

Letting Go Releases Peace

“Your strength is in your calmness, in your clarity of mind. Strength comes from putting the negative aside without reacting. win in calmness, in consciousness, in balance.”   Yogi Amrit Desai

“Don’t ever mistake my silence for ignorance, my calmness for acceptance, and my kindness for weakness.”    Unknown

“In the end, it’s not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away”    shing xiong

In every part of our lives we hope to gain control. What frustrates us the most is when our plans go awry. Of course there are always plenty of people we can blame and do fault. We have such a belief in our ability to make things happen, it never occurs to us to look at our helpers along life’s way. These supporters may never get a thank you but I am sure they are not waiting for one.

Most of us have never stopped to review why we still have such faith in our agendas. I like to plan my days however, I am totally aware of the extremely few times my agenda ever flowed smoothly. The few times that my day went according to plan made me think it was purely accidental. Yet I and many others make lists, phone calls e-mails and reservations along with gaining commitments from others. It just never goes according to plan. Continue reading

Searching For Serenity

“Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life; Not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens.”           Khalil Gibran

“Truth is a deep kindness that teaches us to be content in our everyday life and share with the people the same happiness.”   Khalil Gibran

“Love and doubt have never been on speaking terms.”   Khalil Gibran

In today’s demanding world it is extremely difficult to ever be alone with our thoughts. As a matter-of-fact I think that is why so many of us enjoy the technical devices. It gives us an escape at various points throughout the day. This is truly not contentment as  much as it is momentarily escape from the problems of the world. Our minds become focused on a game or networking so we can ease the mind from its’ constant ideas, questions, doubts and fears.

For health and sanity  reasons it is important to slow down and relax. Most people understand that as an impossibility. Now we can make the impossible possible. It is important to strive for our family and produce as nice a life for them as we can. Again I think possibly what we think they want or need is dissimilar from the truth. Kids all want and need the same thing and that is love and attention follows love. Continue reading

Compassion

“We picture love as heart-shaped because we do not know the shape of the soul.” Robert Brault

“Inner beauty to, needs to be told occasionally that it is beautiful.” Robert Brault

We all like to look our best and exhibit the perfect picture to the world. I believe most of us compete with each other even if we don’t want to admit it or face the truth about ourselves. Just take a view of Christmas cards, Facebook, lawns, yards and clothes. There are many more items to speak of but the list is too large to completely consider. I have heard many people say they don’t read all of their mail nor all that is on Facebook because it makes them feel depressed. Continue reading

Build Your Confidence

“Fear is a disease that eats away at logic and makes man inhuman.” Marian Anderson

“It is the trouble that never comes that causes the loss of sleep.” Charles Austin Bate

“Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction.” Albert Einstein

I believe that in all of our relationships we allow fear to enter. This fear causes us more pain than we need to assume or experience. Most of our pain is of our own creation. Husbands and wives doubt each others love or motives. Friends feel let down when their expectations of us are not met. Family members have the greatest burden next to spouses. We expect so much more from them and become inevitably disappointed and pained as well as angry when they don’t meet our expectations.

In all of this we must question our fear of loss. We prefer to keep our friend to ourselves. Sharing might find our friend enjoying another’s company more than our company. Husbands and wives are jealous at times when another person might interact with their significant other. Spouses also question each others desire to spend time with any other friend or relative or activity. Siblings resent each others pleasure with friendships while they ignore each other. Mothers-in-Law and Daughters-in-Law fear losing their son/husband. In all of this the main idea is that none of us care if another has a good time. What we fear is the loss of time and affection from someone we love and care about. Continue reading

Humpty Dumpty Always Falls

“We live in deeds not years, thoughts not breaths; in feelings not in figures on a dial. We should count time by heart throbs. He most lives who thinks the most-feels the noblest-acts the best.    “Philip James Bailey

“If you haven’t time to respond to a tug at your pants leg your schedule is too busy.”  Robert Brault

At times I feel like  Humpty Dumpty. I put way too much on my plate and never accomplish all of the tasks. I am always  playing catch-up and the game, “What should I do first.” I rush around while everything starts to fall apart which leaves me working faster. The busier I get the more mistakes I make and then of course everyone had better beware because that’s when I’ll get angry and look for someone to fault.

Humpty never should have sat on a brick wall. Didn’t he know he was an egg and eggs break easily? Why didn’t I understand that  I couldn’t possibly complete all of my commitments. The amount of work I planned on achieving was ridiculous. It left me frazzled and defeated. It also caused me extra time because I had to fix all of the problems I created when I went too fast, didn’t think before acting, and forgot to take into consideration the important items should come first. Continue reading

Consider What Counts

“You give but little when you give of your own possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.” Kahil Gibran

We search for things all the time. We can never seem to get everything done by the end of the day. We think, maybe if I try harder tomorrow or give up some lunch time or get out earlier from work or get up earlier etc. We’re all lacking time yet we are not so worried about time. It’s as if we want all their is in the amount of time we get in a day. Continue reading