Humpty Dumpty Always Falls

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“We live in deeds not years, thoughts not breaths; in feelings not in figures on a dial. We should count time by heart throbs. He most lives who thinks the most-feels the noblest-acts the best.    “Philip James Bailey

“If you haven’t time to respond to a tug at your pants leg your schedule is too busy.”  Robert Brault

At times I feel like  Humpty Dumpty. I put way too much on my plate and never accomplish all of the tasks. I am always  playing catch-up and the game, “What should I do first.” I rush around while everything starts to fall apart which leaves me working faster. The busier I get the more mistakes I make and then of course everyone had better beware because that’s when I’ll get angry and look for someone to fault.

Humpty never should have sat on a brick wall. Didn’t he know he was an egg and eggs break easily? Why didn’t I understand that  I couldn’t possibly complete all of my commitments. The amount of work I planned on achieving was ridiculous. It left me frazzled and defeated. It also caused me extra time because I had to fix all of the problems I created when I went too fast, didn’t think before acting, and forgot to take into consideration the important items should come first.I am beginning to wonder at the order of importance I place on items in my own life. I know the things I  love the most but I am not sure if they always get the proper attention. I keep telling myself, I will get to the loves of my life when I finish up my need to do list. At times I have little time to give to those I love and if I do have the time, I am too tired to make much of an effort.

I find myself counting the weeks rather than the days. Monday through Friday are full of work schedules. I star my two day weekends. One Saturday I realized I wasn’t completing Monday through Friday work. It was carried over to Saturday. I was angry at myself. I quickly finished up but on Sunday I got an e-mail from work regarding a problem. It coldn’t wait until Monday so I spent some time correcting it. By Sunday night I was exhausted and worried about whether or not I had given enough time to the people that mattered most in my life.

I gathered my family and ate store bought pizza and laughed and joked for at least an hour. It was wonderful but time for bed for the kids came around and with school the next  day I had to say goodnight. I fell back into a soft chair and wondered about my life. Was I living it to the fullest? I believe so because I couldn’t  fit another thing into it. Humpty Dumpty was carrying a heavy load and it was only a matter of time before he or I fell.

The more I reflected the more I came to the conclusion that I needed to detract some things from my life in order to experience my life more fully. It really was so unfair for the boss and my coworkers to shoot me e-mails on my days off. Sure it begins as a quick note or sentence but the message is loaded with more work taking more time from me. I don’t know how it happened or why we have entered into such a mounting situation. We can’t escape from being found out. We can  literally be reached anywhere at anytime. How awful is that! My life is not really my own anymore.

I pondered hard about my options. I could just fall off the wall like Humpty or I could throw some of my burdens off the wall. It may not go over big with the boss or workforce but it has become a survival issue for me. If I fall over, my family loses and so do I. It became an easy decision as I focused on my options again.

That Friday when I got home from work I sat down at my computer and swiftly sent an e-mail to my boss and coworkers. It read something like this. I am going with my family to an escape house to enjoy nature with my family. I mentioned that I would not have service. I would take all e-mails on Monday. My family and I decided to spend every weekend refreshing our minds and souls. I ended with wishing everyone a wonderful escape weekend with their own families.

I still received two e-mails but I did not respond as my fingers were poised above the keyboard. One of my sons helped me out almost reading my mind and shut the laptop cover. I smiled and said thank you. That weekend we watched the kids sports games, had a cookout, went on a couple of walks  with my husband, fixed the yard and planted some flowers. I thought about the workload I’d have for Monday but Monday seemed so far away and I was absorbed and happy. The edginess was gone. The deep breaths were replaced with relaxed breathing. I truly did stop to smell the roses and they were awesome.

Every weekend we go to our get-away which is at our own house, and we escape from the turmoil the world dishes out. Now I appreciate the position Humpty Dumpty is in when he is so aware that he is going to fall. It is just a matter of time. I am so glad I got off of the wall because I realized how fragile I was. I am setting a better example for my kids so that they will never find themselves worrying and waiting for the fall. It is simple. Learn to acknowledge what counts and then do all in your power to give that area time and energy. It’s the only place that will increases your energy rather than deplete it.

“A man who has taken your time, recognizes no debt, yet it is the only debt he can never repay.” Papyrus

“Everything we possess that is not necessary for life or happiness becomes a burden, and scarcely a day passes that we do not add to it.”    Robert Brault

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