“The only real conflict you will ever have in your life won’t be with others, but with yourself.” Shannon L. Alder
“Sometimes when you get older—and I’m not talking about you, I’m talking generally, because everyone ages differently—things you think on and wish on start to seem real. And then you believe them, and before you know it they’re a part of your history, and if someone challenges you on them and says they’re not true—why, then you get offended.” Sara Gruen
“When people do not respect us we are sharply offended; yet in his private heart no man much respects himself” Mark Twain
There is little question or debate. We have become an offended people. It appears to be impossible to state anything or discuss anything without the need to sprinkle words like perhaps, maybe, I don’t mean, there are exceptions etc. I say and do these things myself but honestly, is it against the rules to speak honestly without offending someone.
It is offensive to call Native Americans Indians. I don’t totally understand why except apparently Indians means I am insulting them. I hear people slip and use certain similar unmentionable words and I have not had a bad thought about people or things. I am feeling that those people who decide on such rules are the ones caught up in the prejudice that the words are tied to.
Sometimes we spend so much time in talking about what we can do or say without causing any issues with anybody that little gets accomplished and we end up with more wording to the rules and documents. To please the one complainer we have a zillion law sand regulations. The truth is we never think about the people who go along so as not to cause trouble and friction. Those are the people who deserve to be heard.
Our minds are sent off the track when we begin considering the insulted oppressed and snubbed person. I am all for justice and equality but not for unnecessary silly events and words that are somehow conjured into an offense. If I say a prayer I may possibly offend an atheist. My answer is if he chooses to disbelieve that is fine but let me believe without a hassle. He or she can look away walk away or ignore me.
I am considering the fact that we have too much time on our hands if we are offended by what people say and do at every turn. Nothing happens without a variety of measures to insure no one’s feelings are hurt, trampled on discouraged and anything else one can think of to add to the list. We all feel the need to voice an opinion about some issues that don’t even involve us because somehow we think we must reflect on whether or not it will infringe on us somewhere in the distant future.
I see this as sending our brains on vacation and locking our hearts. We are not thinking clearly and our hearts are disregarded because we must follow only the rules which keep mounting. We are getting overwhelmed with paperwork and regulations. People are wary about saying anything that might possibly land them in a court case. Others watch their step about opinions even if they have a good one because someone will fault them or ridicule them. We went from a society that made jokes by insulting people to a society that is taking themselves way too seriously.
We must lighten up and understand that we are all basically good people who really aren’t out to demoralize subjugate or emotionally harm anyone. Perhaps we use the wrong terms. That does not suggest we are any more of a bigot than those who use the politically correct words of the day. Truthfully only a higher power knows our heart and therefore might judge us. How many of us love to catch others making these kinds of mistakes. It makes us feel good because we are a better person who knows enough not to use such words in the modern era.
When will we focus on finding reality rather than our search for finding those who “break” the rules. I would venture to say many people who lament about being offended perhaps are just attempting to gain attention from their adherence to guidelines. The ball goes back and forth so much that I for one lose the argument and it’s meaning.
Are we afraid of a reality check? Does pretending to be knowledgeable of regulations coverup our ability to see the actuality of life? We are versed at not treading on a man’s rights to travel anyplace he desires regardless of the possibility of his physical aggression towards an estranged wife or girlfriend. We worry about the parent child relationship shadowing the questionable record they have for abuse. By dwelling so much on not offending people such as in profiling for any legitimate reason, places many more innocent people in jeopardy.
How did we get to have and focus on how offended we are about everything. We are all so different and our emotional senses are varied.Throw in moods stresses and burdens and you have the perfect concoction for differences of attitudes and opinions. If one pays attention you find that on one day you have an ally and an enemy but on another day their roles reverse. My enemy becomes my friend and my friend becomes my enemy.
I believe the idea is that we don’t need to always rally around a concept or promote more rules because we are feeling slighted or snubbed. Probably we are experiencing a bad day. If we keep going with fixing every little item we will be left with a locked up heart and brain and a crushed free will. We are thinking feeling people. Using both heart and brain ought to promote trustful resolutions. Sometimes one needs to put up with things we don’t like or agree with. Other times we know something should change. Knowing the difference is vital to a peaceful co-existence with others.
If you like it hot and I like it cool then we must compromise. Attempting to put up barriers so we will all feel justified is not promoting tolerance. We don’t want the complainers receiving all of the attention anymore than we want the quiet downtrodden to be ignored. Maybe tolerance is the answer along with an open heart and brain. If a man or woman has a record of abusing their kids then they need parenting classes immediately or suspension from parenting. That is the simplest solution. Trying to complicate the issue with “their rights” as parents is silly. Hurting kids takes priority. Hurting anyone should take priority. If we follow with our hearts and minds then we shouldn’t need the regulations to tell us right from wrong. If we do require more rules then we have lost our moral compass and are in dire straits.
If we stop considering ourselves as the sun and others as the planets that revolve around us perhaps we might see the true light which guides our every thought and action with love. that is the guidance that keeps us on the right track. It isn’t about our perfect state of comfort as much as our perfect state of contentment. Thinking of all others, not just the few we wish to focus on, brings about that state of mind and body.
“Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.” William F. Buckley
“Almost every man wastes part of his life in attempts to display qualities which he does not possess, and to gain applause which he cannot keep; so that scarcely can two persons meet, but one is offended or diverted by the ostentation of the other” Samuel Johnson
“If I had a large amount of money I should found a hospital for those whose grip upon the world is so tenuous that they can be severely offended by words and phrases, yet remain all unoffended by the injustice violence and oppression that howls daily.” Stephan Fry
“The greatest minds are capable of the greatest vices as well as of the greatest virtues.” Rene Descartes