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“I am definitely going to take a course on time management... just as soon as I can work it into my schedule.” Louise Boone

Technology can be our best friend, and technology can also be the biggest party pooper of our lives. It interrupts our own story, interrupts our ability to have a thought or a daydream, to imagine something wonderful, because we're too busy bridging the walk from the cafeteria back to the office on the cell phone." Steven Spielberg

"While we are free to choose our actions we are not free to choose the consequences of our actions."  Stephen Covey

I miss the love and respect once extended to me. I get home at night and just don't feel satisfied with my day or with people in general. It is confusing to think about the obligations I fulfilled yet it brings no contentment. I reflect for five minutes and fall asleep exhausted. The unhappiness makes me question what I am doing that causes dissatisfaction getting up in the morning. I decide to contemplate it more before I go to sleep or over the weekend.

I never complete my daily tasks

When I asked some people to comment on the numerous tasks they had to complete each day they laughed and said "I never complete most of the things I planned on completing." "I know how you feel I reply because I never finish everything I wanted to do and I blame me. Most people were disappointed with their day and tasks. They were disgruntled with their lack of time for their kids and spouse and also with the little if any time left for themselves.

Find time to investigate why you have none

...continue reading "Lighten Your Schedule And Improve Love."

Investigating the reasons is easy once you find some time to do it. I observe people and discover the simple problem and easy solution so I think. We fill up our day with busy stuff to do. It appears to be relevant but the outcome of our attention to tasks is of small benefit and the price of it is expensive. We may not have the money for a new car so we work overtime at the cost of missing our child's game or time tucking them into bed as well as spending time with our spouse. We believe we will make it up to them on the weekend and feel justified in what we did. We must work but time with family is priceless.

Do you forget  the happy plans you make for the weekend?

The weekend comes and goes and we forget about our happy plans and attend to our jobs of fixing things. At the start of a work week it is life as usual. Some people sign up for extra courses at work in order to improve skills and stay noticed when salary reviews come along. The family needs the money we think. We never consider our last pay check going for new unneeded clothes and other items. It feels satisfying to spend the hard earned money on frivolous things after we worked hard for it. The sense of deserving it is overwhelming.

Are the extra items necessary?

Do we question that the bonus items we buy may be unnecessary and we can  skip the extra time spent at the job? The corporate world takes over our time and our minds. We don't question why we spent so much time at the workplace competing with our co-worker. We want to keep our jobs that's what we believe. Why does the trade world decide our life?  We laugh at those who say we work too hard and respond with "You don't understand." I think if we all begin to understand that we are losing something precious we just may slow down.

Competition creates enemies

Competing begins at birth when parents decide if we are bigger, smarter, more athletic etc. than another child. School continues the pattern and the race is on to win the honor of college which costs more money and time not to mention freedom to live and love. It may sound silly but life and love have been relegated to the back burner.

Do we have a life we enjoy or a life we endure?

There is a difference. Filling schedules with jobs spending for things that actually add to our burdens or items that demand more of our time which is taken from the family. It also leaves us with no free time for us. Some things must be released just like steam from a kettle. Unfortunately it is our decency to each other we let go of. There is a lack of mindfulness towards others and respect is non-existent.

We are more like robots in our manners than humans with feelings. We don't have time for empathy and care because our schedule ties us up in knots and the light of love can't enter such a chaotic life. Our full schedule gives us brief cryptic and edgy talks with kids and angry discussions with the spouse. At times we deliberate and think another spouse would make us happier. We never consider if we don't change our core thinking and behavior nothing changes. Neglect of the family and relationships we have with extended family also suffers.

We believe we can make time for them at some future point that does not  exist nor happen. We are exonerated because putting people and things off makes it easier to let them go without regret or guilt. Maybe we don't realize the gems we are giving up. The marriage suffers lack of attention and the kids suffer lack of parental attention. It is not always attention when we keep our kids "entertained". Consideration comes with noticing their moods feelings emotions and pain. Spending talking and caring time is important to all people. We all love sharing a conversation or story and somehow the laugh or reminiscing makes us respond with love.

Love and attention keeps people together 

Love is free enduring and comes naturally if it is extended to us from childhood onward. Kids learn by observing and how they are treated. People feel happiness with love and respect extended. If a co-worker  recalls our injured or sick child we feel overwhelming good towards them. When we are happy it extends outward and others benefit from our upbeat attitudes.

Anger generates more anger and rage

Kindness spreads into happiness and consideration. We just have to reset our priorities. Is is really that important to work later or longer? Is it relevant to see our kids and read to them or observe their activities or play a game?  Can we be there to tuck them in or listen to their day? Does our spouse need a break or can they give us a needed respite? Does a parent  appreciate a phone call? Is there a friend we have ignored?

We can reset the clock and priorities we have

We can enjoy more laughs and less toys, more love and less sponsored activities, more mindfulness and less running around. Stop looking down at a machine and instead look up at the beautiful sky trees flowers kids and people. They are what fill our lives with contentment every day. They are what matter, what always mattered. they are worth more than any price. We already have it all when we have people to love and who love us. It becomes a problem only when we are too busy to notice or too tired to care. Cut the schedule, slow down, remember who you are. You are worth more than a number on a check. Give respect to others and receive it in return. Trade the antagonizing world in for a loving life. Set your priorities by what really counts and who is more important. You can find the answers by reflecting on who you love.

“The key is not to prioritize what's on your schedule, but to schedule your priorities.” Stephen R. Covey quotes

“If the ladder is not leaning against the right wall, every step we take just gets us to the wrong place faster” Stephen R. Covey

If we are paying attention to our lives, we'll recognise those defining moments. The challenge for so many of us is that we are so deep into daily distractions and 'being busy, busy' that we miss out on those moments and opportunities that - if jumped on - would get our careers and personal lives to a whole new level of wow. Robin S. Sharma

Animals10"Good intentions  are not enough; commitment and sacrifice are necessary." Laurence G. Boldt

"Just because I am strong enough to handle pain doesn't mean I deserve it." Pix

"When our actions are based on good intentions, our soul has no regrets." Anthony Douglas

"No man ever steps in the same river twice cause it's not the same river and he is not the same man." Heractitus

"Integrity is doing the right thing even when no one is looking." C. S. Lewis

Our intentions regarding any matter are mixed and hidden because we are trying to fathom ourselves and others. It may not make sense but if you ask someone why they performed a certain act of kindness or meanness they usually give a group of responses for the one question. It made sound like, "I wanted to help them and they supported me and I felt like  I owed them." The list continues in a confusing way and you wonder why you asked the question in the first place.

Does this mean we don't know ourselves? We perform kind acts due to payback? We support others because we feel others are  watching us? Lastly I wanted to Help. I surmise that the majority of us would rather not think about it and just take the credit. It makes us feel better if we can say this person helped me in the past and I owe them or I helped them in the past so they owe me. I wonder if we hate  to feel we owe someone in any way. I am always on watch myself to come to the aid of a person who helped me at another point in time.

It is funny how it  weighs on our conscience to settle the bill. We worry about settling a bill yet we don't worry about settling an unkind word or action. It seems unsettling to think this person somehow is above us because they performed a kind service to us. We want to come to their aid  even if they don't want it nor request it. I had a friend who needed to repay any  service I did for her immediately. It didn't matter if I did not want the repay at that moment or ever. In her mind if she did something for me the debt was paid and her conscience was clear. Another friend I had done something for repaid me far into the future at a time when I truly needed help. I appreciated the second repay far more because she obviously noticed my need and jumped in versus the first repayment of helping when there was no demand.

I thought to myself maybe that was the crux of the issue. It is easier  to avoid facing the necessities  of others with a myriad of  excuses than to observe someone's hardship and requirement of help. As usual, I am as guilty of this as anyone. If I don't stop to think over my intentions then I might overlook someone in need. I might choose to ignore someone who requires support and ignore any possible good intentions of helpfulness on my part.

There are times when we do things at work in order to get the promotion or the eye of the boss. We like to receive the great reputation so we extend to others out of our wants rather than the other person's privation. There is also the guilt factor which leads many of us to repay a debt because it looks good or aids us in some way. So many times good intentions are must do things. Being coerced into doing things happens every day. There are those people who volunteer to do something and force others to jump on the wagon. Of course these actions are many times worthwhile but again the good intentions may not be present.

I sometimes wonder if by going along with good actions we are picking up good vibes and learning to care. I certainly do hope so. It would be nice to see a world of compassion where all of us thought about the next person and their welfare. If every intention was compassionate and full of empathy we would have a better world to live in.

There are times others let us down because they  are thoughtless to our needs and feelings. Recalling those times we did the same to  others helps us to overcome the self pity. I am not saying to stop loving the self as most of us find little time to think about self yet we should. I am saying how easy it is to hurt others without intending to do so. The wrong look, remark, laugh or action can send us reeling for cover. The intention wasn't there to cause pain but the hurt rang through loud and clear. I suppose we could wear some armor.

Our hope is to always have the best intentions. If we can't do that perhaps we might attempt to think about others in a sincere way. When we come to realize we are all people with feelings maybe we will stop to think before we do or say something that is painful to another. There are those times our intentions are hurtful and we are now remorseful. There are also times when our intentions were totally honest and without any harm meant.

We don't have to analyze every word or action done. We just have to try to do our best and observe any need we see that can be fulfilled. The kindness may never make the newspaper but it is always felt within the heart. There is nothing more revitalizing than experiencing that feeling, especially when it is performing an action that likely will never be repaid. That is when it is unconditional and not ever meant to be repaid. That is an unconditional act of love that will endlessly travel around the world.

"Think the best of each other especially of those you say you love. Assume the good and doubt the bad." Jeffrey R. Holland

"Your wings already exist. All you have to do is fly." Anonymous

"I will not die an lived life. I will not live in fear of falling or catching fire. I choose to inhabit my days, to allow my living to open me. To make me less afraid and more accessible. To loosen my heart until it becomes a wing a torch a promise. I choose to risk my significance; to live so that which comes to me as seed goes to the next as blossom and that which comes to me as blossom goes on as fruit." Dawn Markova