"Reputation is what others think about you; character is what God knows about you. Adrian Rogers
Independence can mean different things to a variety of people. This liberty is vital and necessary. Regarding the mother-in-law (MIL) and daughter-in-law (DIL) it allows one to accept help when one needs it and to refuse it when a person doesn't want aid. We all have capacities and talents. If we trust ourselves and have confidence, we recognize at times, the need to acquiesce to another so as not to decimate their independence.
Even if certain ideas are more appealing or are proven to be better, silence may be our best ally. We can't push our ways onto another. We can be right and we can be wrong because we are independent of another. Security and confidence produces a kindness sprinkled with patience. We have nothing to prove. When we have the need to make a point or win an argument we are less confident full of anxiety due to our inner feelings of inadequacies. It doesn't mean we are lacking at all. It does exhibit a need for inner contemplation and a sense of questioning why we feel inferior.
Being wrong is a learning experience and diminishes us in no way. Being right engages a moment of praise and nothing beyond. Pride can be more destructive in the long term than failure is in the short term. It may take courage to speak against the crowd but it really does take more courage to keep ourselves quiet and to listen. Tomorrow is another day with more opportunities to show what we are. Reputation is others' opinion of you. God knows what we truly are. What do you think is more important?
"Not in the clamor of the crowded street, not in the shouts and plaudits of the throng, but in ourselves are triumph and defeat." Henry Wadsworth Longfellow