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Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.” C.G. Jung

“We search for happiness everywhere, but we are like Tolstoy’s fabled beggar who spent his life sitting on a pot of gold, under him the whole time. Your treasure–your perfection–is within you already. But to claim it, you must leave the buy commotion of the mind and abandon the desires of the ego and enter into the silence of the heart.” Elizabeth Gilbert

“The most introspective of souls are often those that have been hurt the most.” Shannon L. Alder

How important it is to be more introspective before we say and do those simple things that wound others so deeply. I can’t count the number of times I feel like some of the things I am doing are so trivial and unimportant. I actually  think I am wasting my time by stopping to chat with another person for a few minutes. Now it is clearer to me that most if not all of those inconsequential happenings are some major life events.

I suppose this sounds trite and sort of ridiculous I guess.  I am trying to be introspective  because I realize the importance  of those trivial days filled with conversations and encounters. I do not have the time to think more about them with my busy schedule yet they hold more meaning and consequence than I can believe. I remember how awesome I feel when I speak to some of my neighbors who fill me with cheer with just their smiles. ...continue reading "The Introspective Habit"

It is easy to hurt another person with our simple exchange of talks or actions. Clearly it explains how relevant those words and actions actually are. I hear from numerous people about the rudeness of others whether it is the clerk at a store, a co-worker, friend or relative. The hurt is genuine. I am too stunned at first to offer a reply and by the time I think of something the opportunity escapes me. Of course the wound is carried with me for a long time and the frustration of not having  retaliated and defended myself lasts a long time.

Worrying about the many jobs and plans I have for each day leaves me little time to be introspective. I have to accomplish so much and I don’t have time to breathe never mind rethink what I am going to say or do. I can’t take the time to think before I speak. Who does that? It is more honest to speak your mind and state the facts I tell myself. If someone can’t take the honesty then isn’t it their  issue not my issue? Am I responsible for the world’s  feelings? Is it my fault if some people  are thin skinned? Shouldn’t they toughen up?

Actually the world has toughened up and allows the mental processes and physical processes to overtake any emotional concerns. I review my own encounters and wonder if we are going down the wrong path. Although it is important to get our work completed and make money to provide for the family, I believe it is more important to remember to take care of the emotional needs of children and adults.  By neglecting to do this we place more and more people into emotional states of emergency.

Now it seems like I am overreacting or sympathizing with the weaker members of society who must toughen up. I need more introspection on this for sure. If our choice is to wipe away empathy sympathy and compassion for others we  suffer the consequences. If one falls on the universal treadmill they will be stepped on walked over or tripped over. Many people step along without any offers of help. We can justify our actions because we have too many things to do.  should they have known better right? We do not take off the outer shell that surrounds us.

God help the kids who don’t fit in or conform to the norms of the society. They are ignored or tossed away. Honestly  we put little stock in the daily happenings of our world. Child abuse spousal abuse and drug abuse is on the rise. More people commit crimes of physical abuse.  There are so many disputes between people that  it gives rise to or egos. Every exchange we have with another person becomes an issue of winning or losing so we fight.

Our egos outmatch our hearts in every manner. As the ego gets bigger, the heart grows smaller.  If we are a bit introspective we discover that crushing another in a physical or verbal manner does not always make us the winner. We are full of anger and hate. It overflows and at any moment we attack  and it is not always justified.

There is perhaps more time spent on winning battles about who is right or wrong than spent on getting along and finding peace. If our child comes home from school and complains about a bullying issue we send them back to school in fight mode. Do we attempt to explain the right and wrong of the problem which takes more time? Introspection is required here unless we want the shorter route of time and then encourage our kids to fight back.

Now I am seeing why those simple little meaningless acts of care and concern are not so simple. They are holding the world in their hands. Whether or not the world is dropped depends on the words and exploits we exhibit. Doesn’t it appear to be important to use some introspection once in awhile or every day? If people reach the end of their rope when dealing with minor issues then why is it not plausible to see the world doing the same thing?

Becoming  more introspective enhances our intuitive knowledge by teaching us how to be more compassionate, empathetic and mindful of all people. The simple thoughtful conversations and manners that generate from that attitude bring more enlightenment to the world than all the plans of the greatest of people. Introspection, kindness and love take care of more problems without the need of experiencing guilt or the need to forgive. Introspection also leads to a slowing down of our expectations and an enhancement  of our patience.

“The inertia of the mind urges it to slide down the easy slope of imagination, rather than to climb the steep slope of introspection.” Marcel Proust

“If the whole universe can be found in our own body and mind, this is where we need to make our inquires. We all have the answers within ourselves, we just have not got in touch with them yet. The potential of finding the truth within requires faith in ourselves.” Ayya Khema

“Judgmental heart has lack of introspection.” Toba Beta

“God whispered, “You endured a lot. For that I am truly sorry, but grateful. I needed you to struggle to help so many. Through that process you would grow into who you have now become. Didn’t you know that I gave all my struggles to my favorite children? One only needs to look at the struggles given to your older brother Jesus to know how important you have been to me.” Shannon L. ALder

Choosing To Live 4"You don't always  have to defend yourself in words. Silence gives people the clue you have better thoughts in mind." Pinterest (anonymous)

"Anyone who has never made a  mistake has  never tried anything new." Albert Einstein

"An old man said "Erasers are made for those who make mistakes." A  youth replied, "Erasers  are made for those who are willing to correct their mistakes!" Attitude matters. Anonymous

How difficult it is to discover the self and uncover some hidden truths about  the ways we sabotage our life. I suppose we are thinking that is not true. I know I attempt to discover who I am all the time and understand myself. If I discover a problem I try to fix it or if I discover something worthy I work to make it better. I don't want to waste my time on falsehoods but the truth in my attempts is I want to discover what makes me who I am.

It is almost impossible to face our anger, fear, impatience, distrust and so many other negative emotions. It really is easier to find our goodness when we have just helped a friend or co-worker expecting nothing in return. I believe we need those moments in order to accept some of the things about ourselves that might need some work. I don't wake up in the morning thinking about what it is I should work on or improve unless it is the garden.

It feels like we hide from the self as if we really don't  know who we are. Likely we all know our faults better than our virtues and most of us myself included,  discover so many faults that we stop searching for anything good believing we are just not that good of a person. Even the boastful people  may be simply covering  their honest beliefs about self and boast so they can cover-up the truth.

I am thinking that unless we choose to discover how many good things there actually are within us and our lives we won't have the guts to face what it is that needs some fixing or tuning up. Nobody is fully bad or good at every second of every day. There are some happenings that cause us to offer assistance in some way and throw out positive vibes in our words or actions.

I think  we try too hard and we don't take notice of baby steps forward. We only recognize the huge steps of progress made. There are many days when such progress can't be achieved and one can feel like an underachiever. At times it isn't that the bar is too low or too high but that we are so busy and lost in our thoughts. There is so much on our brains that we think it is a waste of time to reflect on anything.  I have said it myself to others that I don't have time to reflect.

If one takes a moment to let that statement penetrate the brain we understand the significance of that statement. What are we doing that is more important than thinking which is what reflection is all about. If we give up thinking we give up our humanity and become robotic.

There are days that appear to verify this belief. Reflecting makes a person come to understand what is more important to accomplish. The value of someone else's needs becomes prominent and altruism begins functioning. Can we jump to the point of understanding that this altruism is what makes a person consider another to the point of giving up their life if necessary for that person. That is mindfulness at it's best.

Many people falsely believe that they would probably act cowardly if in a position to choose. Nobody knows how they would react. Granny may be the person who leaps to the rescue for all we know. So many of us are not sure and we don't actually know nor have we tried to discover the real person inside of us. A real person is weak and strong. A real person makes mistakes but learns from them and attempt to do better. A real person sees the good in others and is not afraid to praise that good because it doesn't bring him down in any way by praising another. A real person makes the time for others when she doesn't have any time to give. All of these are forms of altruism. It is placing others before self  and it applies to family friends and strangers.

Perhaps if we witness and discover some good in us we will search to fix what is wrong without fearing it. As long as we refuse to face any blame in self, we continue making those same errors. If you want change then you must do things differently. If we want improvement we can't be afraid to face what we don't want to see or discover within ourselves. Those small areas of blame can be reworked only if we observe them and work on them.

I know I hide a lot and I am trying to change that. When there is a disagreement with someone I tend to review all the things I said and did that were correct in attempting to improve a problem. I view the other person's mistakes in what they did to make things worse. In the process, what I did to make things worse is ignored and what the other person might have done to make things better I overlook. Neither of us end up seeing eye to eye. I go away pretending I was right and they were wrong but in my heart I know the truth. Now the problem is covered a bit deeper so it will be tough to look at it and resolve it.

Now if one plays this game throughout their life you can appreciate why nobody makes amends or peace with siblings parents children mothers-in-law or daughter-in-law or friends. We just make connections to different people rather than face the issues. To self discover means you get the urge to transform yourself for the better regardless of what you will discover along your path. It is the ultimate path of discovering truth and transforming.

It isn't scary to look at the self and there is nothing to fear when one finds the real person with all of his faults and virtues. It makes life easier to live when you can let go of the worries and fears brought on with hiding and doubting who we are. We do have items to alter but we have so much hidden goodness that we never discover because it is covered up. Let yourself out and let the real you emerge.

"Anyone can love your looks but it's your heart and personality that makes someone stay with you." Anonymous

"Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom." Aristotle

“It takes courage...to endure the sharp pains of self discovery rather than choose to take the dull pain of unconsciousness that would last the rest of our lives.” Marianne Williamson

“When I discover who I am, I’ll be free.”    Ralph Waldo Emerson (Invisible Man)

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