“Life’s not about waiting for the storms to pass… It’s about learning to dance in the rain.” BJ Gallagher/Mac Anderson
It has been a while since I last wrote a post. I have been extremely busy with fear and worry. My daughter whose sons were one and two at the time, was diagnosed with breast cancer. She is doing fantastic now and will finish her infusions in May. She will have her reconstruction soon. She and I and the rest of the family are embracing a full recovery and we attribute it to God and the power of prayer. As much as we all like to think of prayer as hocus pocus, I have come to a full circle with God.
I now know he is here walking beside me every step of the way. I am enlightened to be aware of his presence and glory and power. I believe in miracles and I thank God for my miracle. It has been a long grind which is hard to explain to anyone. All of us have someone we know in a similar situation. some are better and some are worse. It is really hard to put a measurement on love so I won’t try. I don’t blame those who run away from it or try to hide and ignore it because after all if it were something contagious we would all be hiding.
Nobody wants it to enter their lives in any way or form. It entered mine a few times along the way with two aunts, one sister, my mother-in-law brother and friends. When it came to my daughter I was devastated to say the least. Somehow our kids are an extension of us and the better part of us. We spend a lifetime protecting them nurturing them even when they don’t need it anymore. It is natural that their hurt is ours. To be so helpless regarding the ability to take suffering away is one of the most challenging things a parent can endure. I survived with God’s help but the fear remains and I try to keep it at bay but sometimes it creeps in and on those days I pray.
For those who don’t understand that’s okay it is impossible to understand because your mind doesn’t want to go on that route for fear of jinxing yourself. It is okay, just about all of us would do the same in similar situations. It is good to attempt to be a comfort to those who need it. I know the number of angels who came to my daughter’s support and thus to mine were angels in my book. Their efforts of time meals flowers and visits will never be underestimated.
I know we can’t always pay back to those who helped us but we can all pay it forward which my daughter has already started to do. Being a light for each other is what god wants. I know this in my heart. He doesn’t want us to live in fear and I am working on that one as is my daughter. Fear immobilizes and cripples the present. We worry about things that may never come to pass. I know that I will have a strong faith when I can let go of my fears, give them to God and trust that all is well. If we let go and let God as I heard one person put it, we will be calm enough to do his work.
“Gratitude bestows reverence, allowing us to encounter everyday epiphanies, those transcendent moments of awe that change forever how we experience life and the world.” John Milton
May God Bless all of you. My Best