“The price of greatness is responsibility.” Norman Vincent Peale
I am challenging the mighty although we may be a part of that group at any given time. The influential are those people who have such a following that you cannot get to voice an opinion or change the infrastructure. It doesn’t make a difference whether you are a liberal or a conservative. We have stopped thinking and reflecting on issues that are extremely important. Those people running the project be it PTO leaders, cub scout leaders, coaches or a government official may at times appear to lose their heads or their brains when they achieve such positions of control. The good ideas of making a difference fade away and are replaced by the powerful one in charge.
I know we don’t mean to evolve into a tyrant but it happens too many times for us to ignore because in the process key problems get overlooked and we are derailed. Any person who is in charge assumes they took on the burden so they get to decide for everyone. When rulers review problems in conjunction with the members they have their own closed countenance. Unless you are a special member your input is disregarded. The leader leads the rest into what they want. All go along becaue the “friends” add power to the leader. Maybe the friends don’t always agree but tthey are too afraid to challenge or veto what the ruler has said. In this way the mighty tell the people what to say and do. It works for them and the rest of us allow them to lead us blindly down a path without any reflection.
What I see is anything but thoughtful interaction. Regardless of our love for the leader, that shouldn’t influence our vote. I must admit the buddies of the leader get to have some control so it is a system that stays in place. The difficult problem is when one is always on the outskirts. They never have their voice heard.
If you downsize this thinking to include the family structure we get a bird’s eye view of what ails us. I believe the family is the most important teacher in anyone’s life and the most widespread source of imitation of the attitudes, examples love hate principles values and morals that you will find in the society. Whatever is lacking in the home, will filter through to the society. When the home devalues kids, so will the society. Many are thinking they do value their home and kids. I am not so convinced.
After working with kids my entire life and teaching for many years I have determined kids are ignored, disregarded, second rate citizens and placed after our material, physical and emotional wants and needs. I would add th divorce as a primary ignitor of such behaviors, although many homes with two parents are lacking in parenting skills. We have evolved from encouraging parents to stay in horrible marriages for the sake of the kids, to divorcing without thought while disregarding the effects on kids.
It is politically okay to damage kids because they don’t vote. They cannot challenge the mighty. Kids have their emotional scars hidden. Adults see what they want to see and turn their heads from the ugly truth. Divorce hurts and at times destroys kids in many ways. It will leave scars even in the best situation. It will divide families. It will cut the roots of the kids and leave them like tumbleweeds which is where I got the name for my book. A plant with cut roots struggles to survive.
People in power won’t question such an issue because they need votes. They will instead provide money for food to feed the now disseminated family which lives in two households having less money. Parents blame teachers schools lawyers and anyone else who deems a valuable source of accusation. Of course there are those in every walk of life who are less than desirable but those are the exception. We need to stand for responsibility and accountability for our children. They deserve to have a loving atmosphere.
Many are afraid to challenge divorce when they hear the news from a friend. We all offer comfort but we may not agree with it. We don’t feel we have the right to step in anymore than we step in when we see a child being struck in a public place.
I am definitely not suggesting all marriages stay together but we have to check our reasons why we want the divorce and realize the affect it will have on our kids. Like playing chess, there will be numerous repercussions from such a major decision. This has bothered me for a long time. To be a witness to thoughtless quick divorces and thoughtless quick remarriages. I know I might have very few people who acknowledge this truth about divorce but without a doubt the kids are with me. The best thing any couple can give to their kids is a stable home environment with lots of love. Everything else is superficial.
“Feelings of worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open and the rules are flexible-the kind of atmosphere that is found in a nurturing family.” Virginia Satir
